Let’s Talk Sex
Written by Angela Kuloba on November 5, 2018
On the 2nd October 2018, I attended a sex talk at Family Health Option Kenya offices in Eastleigh that was organised by VSCo in partnership with FHOK.
They brought in Volunteer experts with information on SRHR issues. Attendance of approximately 100 young people from the community.
Young people acted a role play portraying two distinct families those rigid to talk about sex and an open family.
Challenges young people face accrue from their family due to either lack of support of parents that are so tough hence hard to inform them of changes we’re facing.
It was clear how there’s a big gap between parents and their children especially when it comes to SRHR issues.
While the community is condemning them, it has totally ignored the fact that these young people need guidance.
I too sometimes feel out of space and shape with the radical and drastic change in our community. It’s like I am in a young body but with an old soul.
The Rhumba kind of spirit where many were so traditional and back to the roots.
But clearly, it’s hard to admit that the world has changed and so are the people living in this new galaxy.
We’re experiencing a new rise in young people worldwide and everything so new.
It’s the era of the young.
Old people are so hard to find these days.
And I mean the elders who could sit you down and talk to you about some issues like sex something that I only got to read about during my history class back then in high school.
Now we’re in campus and even scared to talk about it because it will force you to do a ritual afterwards in cleansing your bad omen and spirit of talking about sex.
Our society is facing a lot of sexually caused curses that we cry in bitterness over HIV, early pregnancy, Abortion, Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and sexually transmitted infection (STIs) and many more.
But the bitter truth is that we’re the cause and have the solutions to all these.
Having a blind or soft spot or worse of ignorance to it is not a solution but rather an accelerator.
All this starts from our close allies and groups.
The family will forever be blamed for the tragic situations we face at least that’s as per me. Why say this?
How open are you when he/ she comes to tell you about their feeling toward the opposite sex?
Yeah, I know the reaction!
Probably is a no talk affair and they go out wondering what went wrong?
They meet up with their peers who tell them to ignore you and do as their heart pleases.
But it’s not what they want but rather the pressure within and external is extreme and without guidance, they can’t control it.
It’s a stage of beauty yet destructive if not taken under control.
Nowadays parents don’t even have time for their kids, gated communities and the only lessons you get to learn are online.
Because from work they are tired, and over the weekend they need time alone.
You don’t get to see them or even talk to them for the close person you have is perhaps the nanny who is also scared of streamlining you because that’s not her responsibility as an employee.
And that’s when you find fresher men in the University being tricked into alcohol and later on lured to sex with the old comrades.
Innocent souls from home lamenting on pregnancy or rather scared and run to get an illegal abortion that results to infertility or complications all in the name of “I didn’t know it could turn out this way”.
They say information is power but I say it’s useless if not used correctly and wisely.
You may assume she/he is old enough but they still need guidance on sexual matters.
Because blindly they fall victims and even create traps for the rest.
Make it a routine and talk to your children to the parents and sibling be open enough to communicate such issues.
If we want to curb such incidents like murder because of a relationship, suicide because of breakups we need to start talking freely.
Give them the facts and information needed, don’t make decisions for them let them art their paths by making wise choices.
Allow them to experience the joy of support as they lead the way.
It’s a journey they need lights to embark on as the watch not to fall.
Show them the difference between back then and now, let them share with you the today’s values and norms then together experience the difference.
To the young people in the University take what you need not what you want.
That’s where life begins and that’s where it can end too be wise be smart.
Sex is not a taboo but communicates in advance to be on a safer side.
A coin to have two sides not identical so you know choices to have two sides.