Let’s not fool ourselves, most guys in their 20s or even late teens have regular casual sex, so I am not here to preach total abstinence from sex. I am here to speak on the benefits of abstaining from sex for a period of time (maybe 4-8 weeks) and then going back to it. The benefits are enormous. Oh, and to the ladies, I am a guy, so I can’t authoritatively speak on the benefits for females, that is why this article is just for men.
The abstinence I am talking about is- no form of sexual acts at all; no penetration sex and no masturbation of any sort. You have to retain that sexual energy…retain your juice. So, that means, no pornography; whether via pics, video, or even literature.
Below are 7 advantages of abstinence- for men.
Mastering Self Control
There are a lot of men that can’t control their sexual urges out there. I mean, well respectable men in the society like priests, pastors, teachers, professors, and bankers who get into one sexual scandal or the other because of lack of self-control. I am sure you have read the countless stories; they flood social media daily. The problem is that if you don’t learn self-control as a man, you are at high risk of getting involved in a messy sex scandal case.
Practicing temporal abstinence from sex will help you build self-control. Once you can train your mind to say NO to sex when your body is craving it badly, you will start to build up a strong self-control when it comes to matters concerning sex. And the best way to do that is to set a time frame in which you would not have sex even if the opportunity presents itself. It is very hard to practice total celibacy (that’s why Catholic priests keep getting involved in one sex scandal or the other), but temporal abstinence of 1-3 months is very achievable. I like to be very realistic.
When you remove sex from the equation of any relationship for a period of time, the man and the woman start looking for other means of pleasing themselves other than getting sexual. This ultimately leads to deeper understanding of themselves, and a relationship with more depth that has more chances of lasting longer.
Sexual Energy Transmutation
Sexual energy is one of the strongest emotions in man. That urge for sex can make you do anything. I mean, anything, just to satisfy the craving for sex. I just went out to refill my gas, and the 10 minutes that I was there, I watched this male goat chase the female goat around for sex. It did this for a whole ten minutes and didn’t stop; jumping walls, knocking down plastic tables, and all that. You could see the drive and determination to satisfy that urge in its eyes.
We, humans, are more sophisticated animals, but we are animals nonetheless. If a man can abstain from sex for a period of time, and transmute that sexual energy elsewhere, he would achieve a lot in a short period. There is no magic to sexual energy transmutation. All you have to do is abstain from any acts of sex for a particular period of time and then focus on a particular area of your life you want to improve in. Your built up sexual energy would naturally be transmuted to whatever form of energy you need to achieve whatever it is you need to achieve in your life.
Reduced Health Risks
It ain’t rocket science. The less casual sex you have, the lower your risks of contracting sexually transmitted diseases like HIV, Gonorrhea, Syphilis and the likes.
Finding Joy in Unexpected Places
When I was in my late teens and early twenties, sex was really not a big deal to me. I just loved music and loved to spend time with friends. When I got into my ‘beast-mode’ phase where love was a foreign word to me. It was just sex, sex, and more sex. No room for love at all. Then, I got out of that phase and became a bit more balanced. When I abstain for periods of time, my brain still craved endorphins (feel good hormones), which were easily gotten when I was a sex maniac, so it (my brain) went to work to find ways to get that without sex. And I started experiencing joy doing many other things other than sex. This is what will naturally happen to you when you abstain from sex. You will find joy in unexpected places.
When you abstain from sex for a period of time, you will notice that you have more free time. This is because, before then, you probably would be on BBM, Whatsapp, WeChat, or Badoo most part of the day, chatting up one girl or the other, prepping her up for when she would come over to the slaughterhouse. lol! But when you know you won’t be having sex for let’s say 6 weeks, you don’t do all that, and this would automatically increase your productivity at work, school, or in your business as the case may be.
More Time to Focus on Life Goals
So many people have goals, and dreams, and aspirations. Everyone wants to be successful or rich like Dangote, but most men lose focus when having too much sex comes into the picture. I know a guy who has very great dreams and would always say what he would do when he got such and such amount of money. But when the money eventually comes, the first thing he would do is to call up a call girl for sex (an expensive one at that) or start spending money to get a girl that once said ‘no’ to him.
Having long periods when you abstain from sex can help you focus more on your life goals and achieve a lot more in a short period of time.
In closing, as I said earlier, I am not saying I want you to give up sex forever…But, try and give it up for a period of time and witness the benefits in your life.
Guest post first publish: Out of The Ordinary